what'll you do when you get lonely,
and nobody's waiting by your side?
you've been running and hiding much too long.
you know it's just your foolish pride..

layla, you've got me on my knees,
layla, i'm begging, darling please,
layla, darling won't you ease my worried mind?

i tried to give you consolation,
when your old man had let you down.
like a fool, i fell in love with you,
turned my whole world upside down.

layla, you've got me on my knees,
layla, i'm begging, darling please,
layla, darling won't you ease my worried mind?

let's make the best of the situation
before i finally go insane.
please don't say we'll never find a way,
and tell me all my love's in vain.

layla, you've got me on my knees,
layla, i'm begging, darling please,
layla, darling won't you ease my worried mind?

layla
eric clapton

funny how some songs just get stuck in your head in the morning, and never really let you go. i've been humming you all day, singing you on a rooftop over a cup of chai, but you've still got me.
i'm not seeing it. there's something, right there, staring at me with those wide open eyes, and i'm looking right past it. and sometimes you want to escape so badly, to just be able to drop it all and walk..run..into the distance, where no-one can find you, and no-one can touch you, and none of this is real anymore.
but there's something, always something, tugging at the sleeve relentlessly, pulling you back each time you finally make up your mind to go.

somewhere in this darkness there's a light that i can't find,
maybe it's too far away, or maybe i'm just blind..
maybe i'm just blind

ah. line's been cast, we're asail..where to, and why, it doesn't matter. it never matters. running away has always been the easiest thing in the world, and i've always found myself taking the easy way out. that doesn't make me the best person you'll ever know, but i'm just trying to live..

someone's sitting in the car, worrying. baccha..nothing's being thrown at you.

i have no answers for you..
..answers, answers..always running, always searching, always claiming.
always running, never caring.
haha, haha.
drift, drift..like little barks tossed here and there in the perfect storm.

this idleness..it does strange things to a perfectly (un)sound mind. what is a sound mind, in any case? physically..you couldnt find one better. all systems exactly where they're supposed to be, nice and proper.
a sound mind...capable of logical thought? dunno..not sure..each mind has its weakness, where logic goes flying out a cleverly disguised wall which is, in actuality, a window.
wondow.
random association is always good.

i find it hard to explain how i got here..
i think i can,i think i can,
but then again i will falter,
dream.

nice verse. dream little doggie, dream.

spinning..tops..tops were always fun. used to play with mine for hours, outside in the driveway of C-23, islamabad.
islamabad: great place to live growing up, not such a great place to visit for extended periods. much greeness..cool. lots of places to go on short treks..cool also. many wild boars..not so cool. biking trails into wilderness..still cool.
and, ofcourse, ready access to the mountains. islamabad is like a springboard..its the first stop before you head off into the hills.

and we're all headed to the hills. where else would you go? its either the dizzy heights, or the sands of places you can't get any lower at..water gently lapping at your ankles. nathia gali, the hot and the cold one.

acha. that seems quite enough.

let it rain, let it rain..

i'm so tired of being here.
suppressed by all my childhood fears.
and if you have to leave,
i wish that you would just leave.
'cause your presence still lingers here,
and it won't leave me alone.
these wounds won't seem to heal,
this pain is just too real,
there's just too much that time cannot erase.
when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears,
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears.
i held your hand through all of these years.
but you still have...
all of me.
you used to captivate me by your resonating mind,
now i'm bound by the life you left behind.
your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams
your voice has chased away all the sanity in me.
these wounds won't seem to heal,
this pain is just too real,
there's just too much that time cannot erase.
when you cried i'd wipe away all of your tears,
when you'd scream i'd fight away all of your fears.
i held your hand through all of these years.
but you still have...
all of me.


i tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone.
but though you're still with me,
i've been alone all along.

when you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears,
when you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears.
i held your hand through all of these years.
but you still have...
all of me.

my immortal
evanescence

nice song..a song for silent streets, for wandering alone with at night.
and people insist on hanging on..sometimes i can't understand it. how can you hold on to something that no longer exists? it's gone, just by virtue of the fact that the other half has changed. one is necessarily a part of the other..the memories, feelings, smiles were all there not just because of who you're with, but who they were at the time.

remember the good times. don't hold on..don't force the other side to compromise, not like this. in the end, that's all i hope for..whoever you are, i hope i'm not making you compromise.

ha. look at me..i speak as if i've seen the world.